Dementia Tries to Throw Us Off Balance

One of the physical changes I have noticed over the last several weeks/months is the gradual worsening of Jim's balance . From what the doctor has told me and from what I have read, this is not uncommon in the later stages of dementia. I worry about him falling. Falls often lead to a cascade of other problems and a possible hospitalization. When I study his gait, I realize that a walker would not help, in fact it would probably increase the likelihood of a fall and injury. When he walks, he does not pick up his feet enough, causing a shuffling kind of walk that results in his sneaker catching on the floor. In addition, he walks more stiff-legged, which also causes problems with his balance. His favorite sneakers with the rubber soles don't help, and I believe make it worse. But he is not amenable to wearing different footwear.

His favorite outdoor activity, sweeping the driveway, is no longer safe for him to do because of his unsteadiness. This is such a sad moment for me; sweeping the driveway was one of the few things that he was able to do, adding to his sense of accomplishment. Jim has no awareness of his balance problem. This means that I need to pay close attention to the driveway; I try to get out there to clear the driveway before he has a chance to see the errant grass clippings, twigs etc.

As you can see by the above photo, I had grab bars installed. The closest one will give him support as he maneuvers over the small step into the shower. The other bar is placed so that when he is sitting on the shower seat, he can use the bar to safely lower himself as well as pull himself up. There is a hand held shower head that will be useful too. He does not see the need to use the corner shower seat at this time, but at some point I'm guessing he'll agree.

Sometime in the future I'll add a grab bar in the commode room if it looks like it is needed. A good friend of ours installed the grab bars for us. He is a carpenter by trade, and semi-retired. He also fixed a french door in our lower level that needed adjustment in order to use the deadbolt. I am so grateful for our friends!

Jim's breaks with reality are more frequent. Although this is to be expected as the disease progresses, it can make for some very rough days. One of the more common delusions in folks with Alzheimer's Disease with Psychosis is one of misidentification. Jim experiences this quite frequently, sometimes not realizing who I am, and even more often, not recognizing our home. This is the one that seems to be the most troubling for him. It occurs when we are driving home from someplace. As we pull into the driveway, he insists this is not our home. He becomes upset thinking that we are going to walk into a stranger's house. The only thing that breaks this train of thought is to leave, drive around a bit, try some distracting conversation, and then head home.

The card below is the "Companion Card" I had printed. I know I have talked about this before, but for newer readers I thought it was worth mentioning again. I always carry a few with me. The response I get from folks is always so positive. I like to think that perhaps the cards help others to be more understanding whenever they run into someone whose behavior seems odd or strange. A little kindness and understanding go a long way.

I want to end this post with a very sweet moment that I will cherish forever. A couple of days ago, after a particularly psychotic day, Jim came up to me, hugged me and said "Thank you for everything you do for me." With these very precious words, all the stress just melted way. I hugged him hard and said "And thank you for everything that you do for me too."

Thanks for stopping by; I so appreciate each one of you.