tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1268654142180590336.post1523312509342920676..comments2023-11-14T00:05:35.172-05:00Comments on One of Life's Little Surprises: What A Difference A Year MakesCarolehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17237805282007404140noreply@blogger.comBlogger17125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1268654142180590336.post-11925029944490904542016-11-03T06:18:04.671-04:002016-11-03T06:18:04.671-04:00Thanks for your comment. Glad you enjoyed reading ...Thanks for your comment. Glad you enjoyed reading my post.Carolehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17237805282007404140noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1268654142180590336.post-14828874727333930402016-11-03T04:59:01.860-04:002016-11-03T04:59:01.860-04:00It was nice to read your post. It would be a great...It was nice to read your post. It would be a great thing to accept the changesweekend-winduphttp://www.weekend-windup.com/noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1268654142180590336.post-1580961078624551832016-11-01T01:55:49.548-04:002016-11-01T01:55:49.548-04:00Wow, thanks for your great response Jan. It is suc...Wow, thanks for your great response Jan. It is such a highly charged, emotional issue on so many levels. It's balancing the needs of your spouse with your own needs, as well as dealing with the emotions of loss and responsibility.<br /><br />Our county has a program that is called "Nursing Home Without Walls". The name is more optimistic than the reality. It does provide some at home care that is covered by Medicare and/or private insurance, but the key words are "some care". The rest is up to the family to provide and finance.<br /><br />There are definitely some good residential options, but I think you have identified the key: do your research and plan ahead of time. When my dad was at the end of his life (Lewy Body Dementia), and his care became more than could be managed by family at home, it became an emergency placement. We did not have good options at the time. It still haunts me, but I know we were doing the best we could, given the circumstances. <br /><br />I love your description of an early reconnaissance mission. So much to think about and to plan for. Carolehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17237805282007404140noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1268654142180590336.post-26677555632210036062016-10-31T21:54:28.322-04:002016-10-31T21:54:28.322-04:00There are lots of bad nursing home stories, and re...There are lots of bad nursing home stories, and realities (alas), but I don't think they are the only kinds of care situations out there. Just like with summer camps, which can be terrilble and "in it for the money", or truly amazing experiences for kids, I think there are a broad range of care facilities with equally broad ranges of competence and true caring for their residents. <br /><br />Since I have a spouse who has a progressive, terminal disease, I believe it is in our best interest for me to be looking, slowly and methodically, before it becomes an emergency, at all the options for care in our area. I, too, would like to think I am strong enough and that the at-home care resources are robust enough that residential care doesn't become necessary. <br /><br />On the other hand, if there were some very good residential options, I'd like to be able to consider one of them if this goes on to the point of affecting my good health, and beyond my ability to manage properly with day help. <br /><br />I've visited two local facilities this year, and Wednesday am planning to visit another, as a very early reconnaisance mission only. Should be able to rule some out, and hopefully have a preliminary rule-in of at least one, eventually. We'll see!<br />Thanks for writing, Carole.Jabberwalky08https://www.blogger.com/profile/06554545417173075680noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1268654142180590336.post-36425841848060130952016-10-31T12:54:25.567-04:002016-10-31T12:54:25.567-04:00This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.Jabberwalky08https://www.blogger.com/profile/06554545417173075680noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1268654142180590336.post-58665987416157670272016-10-30T12:24:00.672-04:002016-10-30T12:24:00.672-04:00Thanks DJan. I too, am filled with gratitude for t...Thanks DJan. I too, am filled with gratitude for the friends I have discovered through other blogs, as well as my own. The connections are strong and they nourish my soul. The caring and compassion that is sent and received over the blogosphere is nothing short of amazing.<br /><br />I've often wondered how we all managed to "find" one another. I guess it doesn't matter; just so grateful that we did!Carolehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17237805282007404140noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1268654142180590336.post-8386759754676203792016-10-30T11:07:12.422-04:002016-10-30T11:07:12.422-04:00Your previous commenters are also "friends&qu...Your previous commenters are also "friends" of mine. We read each others' blogs and comment often. It. It makes me grateful to know we have this community of support. I follow your blog with real gratitude that you are sharing this journey with me. Thank you. :-)DJanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07152183871573797791noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1268654142180590336.post-91238341614888369952016-10-30T10:20:11.175-04:002016-10-30T10:20:11.175-04:00Thanks Patti. Yes! I am grateful for my insight to...Thanks Patti. Yes! I am grateful for my insight to my own changes, as well as Jim's. It helps me to see the progress I have made and gives me hope that I'll continue to be able to adapt as we go forward.Carolehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17237805282007404140noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1268654142180590336.post-21154127939039636342016-10-30T10:13:11.518-04:002016-10-30T10:13:11.518-04:00It was interesting to see how aware you were of th...It was interesting to see how aware you were of the changes but not just those in Jim but also in you. You have come a long way also and I am glad that you have tools to help you. Arkansas Pattihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14156004753267665579noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1268654142180590336.post-2679217389234696042016-10-30T10:05:18.798-04:002016-10-30T10:05:18.798-04:00It was interesting for me to actually think about ...It was interesting for me to actually think about the different changes over the last year. While Jim has certainly declined, I feel a little better about my ability to adjust and adapt. I can only hope that I am up for what the future holds. It helps me to remember that it is Jim that is really suffering from such a huge loss. It makes me appreciate what I have. Thanks for your comment Gigi.Carolehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17237805282007404140noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1268654142180590336.post-45337285393094625202016-10-30T09:04:29.879-04:002016-10-30T09:04:29.879-04:00He sure has declined mentally in a year. The wors...He sure has declined mentally in a year. The worst thing is that there is no cure. It just gets worse. Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1268654142180590336.post-73065963539807340772016-10-29T22:36:12.954-04:002016-10-29T22:36:12.954-04:00Hi Jude. Thanks for your comment. Your story about...Hi Jude. Thanks for your comment. Your story about your grandmother is interesting. I have a feeling that this is a common occurrence in families with a loved one with dementia. You notice something that seems a little off (just a little), but your brain kind of dismisses it. Maybe it gets dismissed because it is something that doesn't fit our image of the person. <br /><br />Clinically and from a distance, it is an interesting disease process to study. But on a personal level it is devastating for the person and the family. I hope to continue with the year to year comparison. I know that the dementia journey is different for everyone, but I know I find value in reading about others' experiences. Somehow it makes me feel less alone. <br />Carolehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17237805282007404140noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1268654142180590336.post-79534157086966862302016-10-29T20:48:16.100-04:002016-10-29T20:48:16.100-04:00Carole, the year to year comparison is an eye-open...Carole, the year to year comparison is an eye-opener, as when you are with a person every day, the decline over time is harder to notice. My grandma had dementia and the disease progressed very slowly, over a period of about 20 years. She passed away a few years ago, just after her 100th birthday. I remember visiting her years before she was diagnosed (I lived far away and didn't see her often). Although completely normal in most ways at that visit, I remember a couple little things that were odd. Her refrigerator has stopped working and she had made an appointment for the repairman to come. In the meantime, she was keeping the butter and cream on the window sill to keep it cool. However, it was the middle of summer, and the sun was beating in through the window. The cream had soured and the butter had melted. It was very unlike my grandmother to show poor judgment. In retrospect, I now realize that was an early sign of the dementia that was to come. <br /><br />JudeDr Sock https://www.blogger.com/profile/13378594360241846301noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1268654142180590336.post-2717670342391511912016-10-29T16:52:07.145-04:002016-10-29T16:52:07.145-04:00Thanks for your comment Kay. I don't always fe...Thanks for your comment Kay. I don't always feel "wonderful", but I know I am trying hard to do the best for both of us. Yes, it can be draining. All the more reason to make sure as caregivers that we take care of ourselves too.Carolehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17237805282007404140noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1268654142180590336.post-59688121331872280862016-10-29T16:49:19.898-04:002016-10-29T16:49:19.898-04:00Thanks for your kind words Linda. I hope to be tha...Thanks for your kind words Linda. I hope to be that voice for Jim. With so many baby boomers aging, we know that the health care system will become overwhelmed with just the shear number of folks needing health care, let alone care for dementia. <br /><br />You too are handling things so well with Bob. Sometimes as caregivers it is hard to recognize that, being in the middle of day to day care. But stepping back is good sometimes, to get that broader perspective and to realize that we really are managing quite well, considering all the challenges we face.Carolehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17237805282007404140noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1268654142180590336.post-21751355732506130322016-10-29T14:57:41.434-04:002016-10-29T14:57:41.434-04:00You are such a wonderful care giver. I'm glad ...You are such a wonderful care giver. I'm glad you're being careful to make sure you're OK too. I know how draining it can be.Kayhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07461569436322815787noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-1268654142180590336.post-24929612077861509482016-10-29T14:35:59.275-04:002016-10-29T14:35:59.275-04:00This sounds like a splendid program for family and...This sounds like a splendid program for family and caregivers. So glad you found it. It's encouraging to note we are making progress in this country in managing different forms of mental illness, not enough, but some. My situation with Bob is very different. He's old, his dementia is not unusual for his age, he's nearing the end of his life. Not the case for your situation. You're very knowledgeable about your situation. You will no doubt become a real voice for Jim's form of dementia. The more voices sounding the call for help means more attention from the medical world and Congress. People like Jim need someone to be a voice for them. You can do that. Lindahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/11586429675286969340noreply@blogger.com